A kid and his straw

We all get lazy on occasion. Some of us get so lazy that we don’t really feel the need to get up. Maybe rather than cook ourselves dinner or walk to the store, we order food, have it delivered to us, and eat it from our Pjs while watching Keeping Up With the Kardashians.

This kid, however, takes the cake. While his parents shop around at Costco, he decided to sit back in a recliner chair, fashion several straws together to create a mega-straw, and drink his drink all while relaxing. We should give this ingenious kid an award.

A proposal

When most of us think of romantic wedding proposals, we think of the Swiss alps, beautiful scenery, and perhaps the favorite things our significant others like to do. Maybe we’ll take them hiking, ride a boat somewhere, or to an extremely fancy restaurant.

Few of us go to Costco.

This couple decided to change that. Arguably the two’s favorite place (because of the savings?), the man felt it appropriate to seal the deal on their relationship in the nicely organized palace of good deals. Fortunately, his wife-to-be felt the same way and said yes.

You need it, Costco has it

Costco is unique among retailers for many reasons. It offers discounted prices on gasoline for its members, for instance. But it also offers numerous other services, including tire-changes, home entertainment installment, and even eyeglass repair. This service, however, is a bit unexpected…

Apparently certain Costcos will allow you to customize and order your own coffins. Now, while we’re not sure whether you need to commit to a bulk package or not (to secure the deal perhaps you need to buy six coffins), we do know that the service is just a little bit odd. But, I mean, a deal is a deal.

How many is too many?

One of the first things to go in the buying frenzy that took place as of late was — you guessed it — toilet paper. And while most stores (including Costco) quickly ran out of the stuff, suppliers have been working hard to get those plies back on the shelves.

And so, we got this…

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At Costco, the supplies of toilet paper have been doubled, quadrupled, and doubled and quadrupled again — all in an effort to supply its hoarding shoppers with the toilet paper they need. While it is certainly not necessary to buy 14 packs, this seems to be the strategy people are adopting.

A tired (and possibly drunk?) bear

Shopping at a retail Goliath like Costco can be a tiring experience. We walk from isle to isle, searching somewhat frantically for the things on our grocery list — potatoes, granola, apples, chicken sausage. Whatever it is, the experience can be draining. But who knew this could apply to inanimate matter as well?

Here, we see a giant stuffed bear that is clearly fatigued from shopping. Perhaps it was trying to find the frozen fish and got overwhelmed by the nearby lawn furniture section (“this would look great in my alpine abode!”). While we may never know what made the bear so tired, we do recognize the feeling.

Priorities

Most of us go shopping to get the things we need. We buy sugar, bread, coffee, maybe some fruits and vegetables. When we panic buy, we usually purchase these things but in bulk. Some people, however, stock up on something not all that typical…

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Here, for instance, we see a man that felt the need to load his cart with an armageddon-sized load of beer. While yes, he may in fact drink this much in the next few months, the payload is enough to make the most seasoned drinker blush. But hey, who are we to judge.

Strange people

Much like Walmart (which you can read about here), Costco has an abundance of interesting characters. While walking through the isles, we might see people with interesting styles of dress, interesting personalities, on an interesting combination of the two. This look beats them all.

Here, we see a woman whose dedication to the chocolate-frosting sandwich is unmatched. Rather than a simple weave or blonde dew, she decided to dedicate her head to a little bit of Oreo-advertising. While we will not deny the deliciously of the cookie, we might deny the quality behind the look.

Two heads are better than one

We’re all familiar with the saying that “two heads are better than one.” While not referring to the macabre ritual sacrifices performed by the inland Maya (who would sometimes decapitate people), it does refer to the idea that two people thinking about a problem is often better than one.

Here, however, we see another concept to which the statement might apply. To this woman, wearing two heads-worth of hair is better than one. It is only better here, however, because of the entertainment it provides. We’re not sure it’s better in any other sense.

Thirsty

We’ve all been there: It’s a Friday night, it’s getting late, and all you want to do is sit back and have a drink. We get it — work can be tough. That’s why Costco is here for you. They know that having to get up to refill that wine glass over and over is just too cumbersome to bear.

So here, we have the introduction of the mega-class. Able to support at least three bottles of wine at a time, you can get your Friday night drink on without having to leave the comfort of your sofa. This is just one of the many life-changing products brought to you exclusively by Costco.

A rarity

It’s not everyday that you find a retail giant like Costco running out of food. Yet, this is exactly what has been happening. Because of the panic buying that many around the nation are doing, the store is running out of certain items — and running out of them fast.

The most common things to go are those you might expect: hand sanitizer, disinfecting wipes, and toilet paper. But other commonly depleted items include eggs, milk, water, and even spam (yuck). To let people know of its shortages, Costco has been leaving these signs outside near the lines to get in.

Enough is enough — or is it?

As stated earlier, many people go to Costco for the sole purpose of bulk-food purchasing. While many of us are only feeding ourselves, we still often indulge in the large pack items. Here, however, we see a man who has taken this principle to its zenith.

This man has likely taken all the available rice that Costco has to offer. This is bad, given that people — such as myself — want to have rice. Anyways, we’ll never know whether he was buying this to satiate the needs of his restaurant or family. All we know is that he shouldn’t take it all for himself.

Happy Birthday

Birthdays are a special occasion. Whether you go out to a fancy dinner, have a party with friends, or simply just stay home and take the day off work, you likely in some way celebrate another successful orbit around the sun. And most of the time, this celebration involves cake.

Here, we see the cake that these children decided to get for their father. While he had simply asked them to get him a cake from Costco, they took this transparent statement and got a bit more creative. They likely made their father’s day.

Long lines

One of the most irksome things (minus, of course, the abundant tragedy) of an epidemic is the buying spree that takes place before and during. This is especially true at Costco, where bulk purchases are made that can last for a long time.

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Here, we see exactly the consequences of such buying sprees. Often times, they entail absurdly long lines that sometimes wrap around the building — sometimes even the block! This horrible situation can increase the time you have to spend at the grocery store by hours. Yikes.

Dine with a friend

Most of us like to spend time with friends and family dining out. We don’t even need a special occasion to do it — often we just say, “Hey, let’s go grab some wings.” Reliably our friends say “yes.” But sometimes, we don’t have any friends (or perhaps they’re just busy). When this is the case, we have to get creative.

Here, we see exactly where that creativity can take us. This woman, ostensibly disenfranchised by friends and the like, has decided that her new friend would be this little stuffed Pikachu doll. And so, like any good friend, the doll accompanied her to Costco for some pizza.

The end of the world

Nobody can malign the French for a poor sense of humor. Well, some people can. But still, they do on many occasion come up with the good joke. And this timely re-branding is just such an example. And here, we introduce to you the beer, La Fin du Monde.

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And what, you ask, does this mean in French? Where exactly is the joke? What on Earth is it that we’re trying to get across? Well, since you asked — La Fin du Monde means “the end of the world” in French. So there you have it: A beer with a timely, if not slightly hyperbolic, name.

Bulk buying

Yes, Costco is the perfect place to stop if you need to bulk buy. Sometimes we’d rather buy five sticks of deodorant so we don’t have to keep running back to the store. But this item isn’t one that you typically expect people to buy en masse.

Turkeys. Yes, Thanksgiving turkeys. Now, we don’t know whether this was due to a scare with the coronavirus or a particularly excited town ready to celebrate Turkey Day. Whatever it was, the arbitrary selection of 10 turkeys per membership seems a bit striking. Who would need 10 turkeys?

The Big Day

It’s commonly said that a wedding is the greatest day of one’s life. And because of this, most people shell out a whole lot of income for the ceremony to be just how they like it: a giant cake, loads of friends and family, and perhaps ever a scenic location like Hawaii or Italy.

Some people, however, skip the expensive or the scenic and choose the continent and familiar. That’s where this couple comes in. Rather than fly everyone they know to a distant land, they decided to gather them all at the local Costco. We presume they saved a bundle.

Cheaper than the ’80s

Another thing that people have often noticed during these times in which fewer people are trying is the noticeable decline in gas prices. In many places, these prices have dropped to absurdly low prices, making the gas per gallon almost as cheap as water.

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While in many this may encourage stockpiling, gasoline is not as easy to store as other things. While with potatoes or toilet paper you might be able to buy in bulk in cram into your child’s room, gasoline does not work in the same way. This is probably for the best.

Big Candy

Who hasn’t dreamed of a candy bar that is almost their body size? Well, while I have not personally dreamt of such things (just think of the cavities!), I can easily imagine a handful of children who have. And, when these dreams are realized, I can’t imagine the happiness they would create. This is where Costco comes in.

Here, we see Costco helping to make these dreams come true. While we’re not sure what sort of voodoo magic Costco has to undergo to make these life-sized chocolate bars come true, they did. And so, for a brief time you could buy enough chocolate to last you until… well… forever.

A bonding experience

We all know that shopping can be a major bonding experience. Whether you’re off to the local markets with your dearest friends, or stuck at home on the couch with your bestie perusing through your cart on Amazon. Whatever you’re buying, you’re also bonding.

At Costco, however, you can amplify this bonding four-fold. And that is what we have here. This little group of women all decided to go to Costco together. It’s difficult to think of an activity more fun. Mini golf? Naw. Frisbee golf? Definitely not. What about just regular golf? We don’t even need to say it…

Let’s hide it

In response to the rampant and somewhat annoying panic buying that has overtaken the majority of Costcos around the United States (and in particular the metropolis areas like New York, Washington, and California), many employees have taken things into their own hands.

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Here, we see how a renegade group of employees decided to sequester their toilet paper staff in a place where no one would expect to find them. Good on them. We need these stocks hidden so that people can actually buy them at a reasonable pace.

A strange flavor

We all know it: chocolate is one of the best foods ever invented. You can eat it practically anytime of day — before or after (or even as a substitute for) a meal. And this is why Costco sometimes baffles us: It provides us a flavor we probably wouldn’t otherwise eat…

Here, you can see that flavor for yourself. While it’s fair to say that none of us have been tantalized by such a flavor, it’s also difficult to imagine that the bar tastes any different than your regular chocolate bar. I wish I could purchase one to find out.

The wrong approach to diabetes

Diabetes is a terrible disease. According to the CDC, around 100 million Americans are thought to suffer from it. And, as anyone familiar with the disease knows, sugar is not the answer. So when Costco set up this table for donations to a Diabetes-focused charity, people just had to snap photos.

Now, whether the candy was meant for the people donating money or for the people with the illness we’ll never know. What we do know, however, is that this combination of diabetes and Skittles is not one often favored. At least the combo is amusing.

A magical form of social distancing

To avoid infecting others or getting infected ourselves, many of us have taken steps recommend by local and federal health officials. For the most part, many of these include recommendations to social distance — i.e., stay a minimum of six feet away from others.

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In order to do this while still being able to shop, some Costco customers have gotten wildly creative. And here, we see just that. This customer decided that their often unused unicorn costume would do the trick, enabling them face and mouth protection from potential sick people. If only we were so clever…

Interesting label

Some people like to deface public property. While most of these time these people are probably teenagers, on occasion it may be a store employee. And in a handful of cases it may even be a store employee defacing the property of the store in which they work.

While we’re uncertain the case here, what we are certain of is that someone looked unkindly on the giant bags of candy being sold at Costco. They looked at them so unkindly that they decided the felicitous label of “DIABETES” might be nice to have on them. Interesting choice, we’d say.

Not for sale

The reason most of us go to Costco is because you can buy things at a discounted prize. Often, this is because the things you’re buying come in bulk. Maybe you get seven toothbrushes or a double-bag of tortilla chips. Whatever it is, the stuff is often cheap.

Here, however, we see a women trying to purchase something in bulk that likely isn’t on sale — her three children. While it’s easy to imagine the sales clerk attempting to scan the bar code on these three teenagers, the situation probably didn’t occur. In all truth it was likely just a peculiar method of transport.

Shop until you drop

Some of us like to play jokes — or, if we don’t play them, we like to hear them. Stand up comedy, for instance, is a major source of entertainment for many Americans. Many of these jokes, however, can also take us by surprise…

Here, we a couple employees at Costco who have either worked themselves to death (quite literally) or have played a joke on any would-be sample-takers that they have. Perhaps implemented as some sort of Halloween prank, these Costco employees got their customers good.

Keep that dog away from me

There’s a saying that everybody has heard at least a dozen times in the life: “A dog is a man’s best friend.” While we can reasonably broaden this statement to instead say that “A dog is a human’s best friend,” the sentiment remains: Everybody and their mother loves a good dog.

Here, however, we are entreated to a different sort of feeling. Rather than love and adoration, Costco has shown us a dog that instills fear. Its eyes are bold with something akin to a lust for death. Be weary of this dog. Costco should know better than to scare away its costumers…