Average income: $63K
“I want everyone to win… I don’t like telling people what they can or cannot do because I think everybody can do whatever they want if they really believe it.” – Tyler the Creator
“Be of good cheer and be diligent… Make the most of every opportunity.” – Michelangelo
Financial weaknesses: Alright, Big Spender, let’s skip the discussion on the difference between want and need (since you ignore it, anyway), and let’s look at those emotional triggers. Is it stress? Failure? Love? Fear? Commitment? Whatever it is, reign it in! No one enjoys living paycheck to paycheck, especially with your giant unicorn pool floaty impulse buy just sitting there, judging you for it (you don’t even have a pool, why do you need this?).
How ESFP’s Get Rich
Financial strengths: So, maybe you aren’t the best at saving money, but you’re a champ at spending it. If you make like Hannah Montana and get the best of both worlds, you can achieve anything. You know what’s technically considered spending money? Investments. You know what you can buy, and in return, it gives you more money? Investments. You know what will get you more money to fund your weird emotional trigger binges? Investments.
Careers to excel in: Get your problem-solving pants on because you’re about to enter the world of finding your purpose. If you like improving lives, try being a guidance counselor, life coach, or emergency therapist. If you prefer the spicier lifestyle, try being an EMT, surgeon, or nurse (well, you can’t just try them, you have to go to school first, but you get the idea).
The New ESFP
Something new to try: No one likes feeling guilty, but it’s kind of inevitable when you make so many impulse buys. Put aside some money every week to allow for those impulsive, useless buys. If there’s extra at the end of the week, but it towards the next week to buy something extra impulsive and pointless. Just how you like it.
Celebrities like you: Marilyn Monroe, Adam Levine, Miley Cyrus, Steve Irwin
Things that upset you: Not being appreciated for small tasks, finances, detailed plans, feeling stuck in a plan or situation, dismissal of what you feel, forced decision-making, quantitative data.
Average Income: $68K
“Success is not the result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire.” – Reggie Leach
“You have enemies? Good. That means you have stood up for something, sometime in your life.” – Sir Winston Churchill
Financial Weaknesses: You make good money, we get it. But your weekly skydiving escapades and your yacht parties barely cover up the fact that you still live in a 500 sq./ft apartment with nothing but eggs, mayo, beer, and Sriracha in your fridge. Although this is forgivable given your passionate nature, you need to step up before you scare away the potential love of your life.
How ESTP’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: Lucky for you, you’re still (probably) a likable human being. People want to know you, and once they know you, they usually want to know more which opens the door to way too many networking opportunities. Fear not, though! You’re so organized with that kind of stuff (*cough*cough*).
Careers To Excel In: Don’t be embarrassed, but your competitive side is showing! We can see right through you, but it’s not necessarily a bad thing for CEO’s, cops, freelancers, professional athletes, or marketers to be competitive. It’s kind of a requirement for those jobs, so dive in and start the race, because honestly, no one wants that one guy over there to win.
The New ESTP
Something New To Try: If you aren’t already managing people in your career, maybe you should start. If you are, keep moving up! If you bottle up that drive and motivation, it won’t turn into a finely aged wine like you think it will. You aren’t Jesus, nor are you an experienced vintner, so stop fooling yourself. Use that drive to make yourself stand out in the professional world (but not like Madonna, maybe more like Eddie Murphy to be safe).
Celebrities Like You: Donald Trump, Ernest Hemingway, Eddie Murphy, Madonna
Things that upset you: Challenging views or ideas, routine, quick decisions, inefficiencies, commitments, goals not being reached, unexpected negative results, behind held back from expressing feelings, dismissal of your analysis of an issue
Average Income: $65K
“The greatest crimes in the world are not committed by people breaking the rules but by people following the rules. It is people who follow orders that drop bombs and massacre villages.” – Banksy
“All children are artists. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up.” – Pablo Picasso
Financial Weaknesses: You’re a thrifter at heart, but not just any thrifter. No, you’re a fur coat sporting, bougie dress shorts wearing, bespectacled chameleon looking for your fellow formal wear friends. Too often, however, you get caught up in the wealth contagion, and you end up throwing up all the money you have. But, surprise surprise, it isn’t much. I guess as long as you don’t get caught dry heaving pennies (yes, pennies are still a thing), you’ll be fine.
How ISFP’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: So, you may have a potentially devastating fault– but who doesn’t? You’re buying all those fancy clothes, but you’re thrifting all those fancy clothes. Yah, you’re saving so much money on your wardrobe that (while simultaneously setting trends left and right) that you can put that extra money aside in your savings, resell some crazy lucky finds, or, you know, continue wasting your money on escargot and mimosas.
Careers To Excel In: You need to let your creative juices flow, but it may seem like your current job is allowing them to flow right down the toilet. My suggestion? Get up and walk out. Right now. Make a scene, throw a keyboard, steal the box of cookies and a few pen packs, and get on your way (just kidding, please don’t). Regardless of how you change your job, whether it’s by title or by company, make sure every day is different. Interior design, graphic design, party/wedding planning, or extreme sports are some things to consider, but don’t let silly ol’ me hold you back.
The New ISFP
Something New To Try: So, maybe you make decent money at a decently terrible job, and you don’t want to quit. If you do some research, you can make some extra spending money (or acquire ridiculously cool products) by being a product tester, a merchandise buyer, or a secret shopper. Bonus: if you become a secret shopper, you’ll actually (probably) be cool for once.
Celebrities Like You: Brittney Spears, Michael Jackson, Jessica Alba, Kevin Costner
Things that upset you: Time pressures, disruptiveness, lack of understanding, dismissal of feelings, conflict, neglect of personal values, procedures or preferences that limit personal freedom, overwhelming environments, disloyalty to people or projects.
Average Income: $65K
“Expect the unexpected. And whenever possible, be the unexpected.” – Jack Dorsey
“There is no normal life that is free of pain. It’s the very wrestling with our problems that can be the impetus for our growth.” – Mr. Rogers
Financial Weaknesses: Let’s make a list of things you’ve probably done at least once, shall we?
- Gambled, and lost.
- Said, “I can stop whenever I want, I just don’t want to.”
- Said, “I’m not stubborn, you’re stubborn.”
- Pushed a few people’s buttons just a few too many times to get a reaction.
Sound like you? It’s ok if you say no, you tend to disagree with everyone anyway, so let’s try reverse psychology. You should gamble away all your money. All of it. Especially your rent. Is it working?
How ISTP’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: You know when little kids approach you with an idea like, “Let’s make dinosaurs real again! Here’s how we’ll do it…” and they’re so optimistic, yet so very incorrect? But regardless, there’s still a tinge of hope in your mind that maybe one day they’ll grow up to be dinosaur scientists and actually make it happen. Well, you’re the kid, and the dinosaurs are your money. When you’re wrong, you’re painfully wrong– but when you’re right, you’re surprisingly right.
Careers To Excel In: Since you despised being confined and told what to do, I’ll tell you what not to do. Jobs where you’re restricted to a cubicle, can’t move around much, are doing the same things day after day and hour after hour are all terrible careers to get into. Unfortunately, your optimism could backfire here (like that’s never happened before), so be wary of your confidence of justifications in a new job or career. Don’t let that accounting company trick you into signing your life away with their tricky convictions like, “You’ll get to work with lots of different numbers,” or, “We can order special, colored sticky notes for you to boost your creativity.”
The New ISTP
Something New To Try: Freelancing is one of those pipedreams that everyone has, but no one actually does. I mean, yeah, it’s risky business to quit your job and rely on clients to sustain you, but guess what? You’re all about the risk, aren’t you? So, give it a try. You’ll be able to be as creative as you want, choose your own (probably insane) hours, do different jobs all the time, and even enable that weird commitment phobia you have.
Celebrities Like You: Clint Eastwood, Bear Grylls, Tom Cruise, Michael Jordan, Indiana Jones
Things that upset you: Being forced into extroverted activities, small talk, out of control emotions, challenging ideas, strict guidelines, authority, noise, inability to logically assess situations, inability to control emotions, lack of independence, disregarding practical realities as pessimistic.
Average Income: $69K
“My alone feels so good. I’ll only have you if you’re sweeter than my solitude” – Warsaw Shire
“Have you noticed how the moon is introverted? She hides during the day when all the eyes could be on her, but she blossoms during the night in the presence of those she trusts most.” – anonymous
Financial Weaknesses: People generally hate you because you don’t have any true weaknesses. Yeah, you’re stubborn, but you back up all your arguments with pure logic and data. You also get faulted for always being by the book, but let’s be real here — we’re faulting you for following your budget perfectly. Occasionally, you’ll get in trouble for being “mean” when all you did was point out that Brad’s entire salad was still living on his teeth, or that other time when you took one for the team and told Cathy that literally, no one cares about the origin of her 9th cat’s Scottish name.
How ISTJ’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: So, you have a budget, you have short-term and long-term plans, and you follow all of them to a T to ensure your success. Nerd. I mean, your idea of “splurging” is getting avocado on your monthly sandwich outings.
Careers To Excel In: So many people want to create their own rules and schedules, but not you! Nope, you thrive in an environment filled to the brim with structure, boredom, tedium, and regulations. Which, lucky for you, is the exact type of career that most people are chronically allergic to and avoid at all costs. Never again will you have to struggle to search for a job! You tend to go towards careers in law enforcement, law, military, finance, auditing, data analysis, or even doctors.
The New ISTJ
Something New To Try: Have you never heard of “treat yo self?” Do you live under a rock? Do you hate happiness? I’m sure you don’t because your weird obsession with sticking to the rules truly fulfills you, but maybe you should try to splurge every once in a while. I mean, if you budget for it, technically it’s still within your budget, right?
Celebrities Like You: Denzel Washington, George Bush, Natalie Portman, Hermione Granger (HP)
Things that upset you: Disregarding rules and regulations you set, challenging your approach, constant changes, inability to complete commitments, lack of control, unorganized people, inefficiency, indecision, uncertainty, illogical decisions.
Average Income: $63K
“Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do, but how much love we put in the action that we do.” – Mother Theresa
“No-one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
Financial Weaknesses: Have you ever heard someone described as being a “bump on a log?” Well, you aren’t too far from that (I would tell you not to take it personally, but we all know you will anyway). Unlike your fellow ISTP’s, you are quite the non-risk-taker when it comes to money (and literally everything else, but that’s beside the point). But don’t fret! Log bumps are incredibly useful in nature, and you are incredibly useful in society (just not really in the economy).
How ISFJ’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: You’re very frugal and thrifty with your money, but that’s only because most of your paycheck goes to the 30+ charities you donate to each month. Although that’s not necessarily the best thing to do with your hard-earned money, that’s exactly what you want to do with it. So, keep it up, Mother Theresa. You’re doin’ swell.
Careers To Excel In: Who is more of an ISFJ– Alfred Pennyworth, or Batman? Surprise! It’s Alfred Pennyworth, the wise, loyal butler, and friend to Bruce Wayne. I’m not saying you should be a butler (if you were, though, you’d be phenomenal), but you should consider careers where you improve lives through serving others (*cough* butler *cough*). Alongside counselors, technical support operators, non-profit volunteers, and missionaries, you tend to be highly sought after in butler/personal assistant roles to very wealthy, giving individuals. And think about it this way, if you’re loyal enough, they’ll leave their wealth to you, and you can donate all of it, every last cent. Convinced? I think so.
The New ISFJ
Something New To Try: One cool thing about bumps on logs is that they don’t change. Once they’re there, they stay there. Just like you. For some godforsaken reason, you’re very content in your cricket infested midcentury (mid-18th century) studio apartment, and in your 5am-10pm intern-until-further-notice job. I get it, change is complicated– but that doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice your quality of life for a closet-sized apartment with a communal bathroom (I don’t care if Tom prefers shaving in the women’s restroom, rules exist for a reason). Try to change careers to something that your bank account (and plenty of underprivileged children) will appreciate. You deserve it.
Celebrities Like You: Beyoncé, Queen Elizabeth, Vin Diesel, Kate Middleton
Things that upset you: Workplace conflict, noise, not being appreciated for help, others’ inadequacy affecting your work, dismissal of feelings, repetitive mistakes, insufficient time to prepare, last-minute changes, procrastination, disregarding set rules.
Average Income: $75K
“Be yourself, don’t take anyone’s shit, and never let them take you alive.” – Gerard Way
“Basically, I’m for anything that gets you through the night – be it prayer, tranquilizers or a bottle of Jack Daniels.” – Frank Sinatra
Financial Weaknesses: Alright workaholic, let’s break it down. You love working, you’re a natural born leader, and you’re very frugal. What’s not to like? Oh, yeah. You hoard all your money, not unlike a squirrel who hoards its nuts for the winter. You know what else you hoard? Vacation days, sick days, overtime hours… you’re simultaneously the worst person to work alongside, and the best boss ever.
How ESTJ’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: You like tradition, and you do what works for you. Some may call you old-fashioned, and others may call you stubborn, but you like to say, “I’m worth my salt.” Maybe you are, maybe you aren’t (you probably aren’t); but either way, you know for a fact that banks are scams, that mattresses hold cash better than anything else, and that debit cards are literally Satan’s infamous mark. It’s only crazy if it doesn’t work, and you’ll be darned if your ways don’t work because they are tried and true since the beginning of time (when you were, apparently, alive).
Careers To Excel In: Your schtick is definitely someplace where you can work long hours, days, weeks, and years (why anyone would want this is beyond me). Jobs that are generally referred to as “the most boring jobs in the world” are where you thrive (if you don’t believe me, click on the link). From accounting and law to sales and finance, you kill it in the slow, steady, traditional environments. You know, like the good ol’ days.
The New ESTJ
Something New To Try: We’ve already discussed your horrible hoarding situation, but I feel like maybe we might have skipped over how much of a terrible thing it can be. For example, you love working, so you never take vacations– but that habit makes you that one person in the movies who works so hard to be rich and successful but has a heart attack before they can ever enjoy it. Yah, overworking yourself can do that. Try taking at least one vacation a year. At the very least, it will make you just a tad more interesting. Trust me; you need it.
Celebrities Like You: Judge Judy, Frank Sinatra, Billy Graham, Grover Cleveland
Things that upset you: Constant changes, uncertainty, lack of control, working with unorganized individuals, inefficiency, inability to complete commitments, challenging ideas or decisions, disregarding set rules, challenging established morals.
Average Income: $73K
“There’s something very addictive about people pleasing. It’s a thought pattern and a habit that feels really, really good.” – Anne Hathaway
“I think love is the through line and it’s universal and it doesn’t matter what period of time, time or place, or people, that’s something we all connect to. That’s the thin thread that I think keeps it all together.” – Rachel McAdams
Financial Weaknesses: Sorry to break it to you, pal, but you’re a stereotype. In high school, you lived the life of the high school cheer captain, the quarterback, the “why are they even popular” popular kid; and you thrived. But back then, you had daddy’s hard-earned money to waste — and now, it’s your own. “But they’re all worth it!” Yes, Becky, I’m sure the parties are worth it, but your bank account looks like you’ll be eating Uncrustables for the next 3 weeks.
How ESFJ’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: You undoubtedly know how to throw a good party, and you’ve gotten so good that you’re now the go-to advisor on party planning in your cookie-cutter suburbia. Even though everyone knows their parties can’t live up to half the hype of yours, people love how frugal you can be with the decor without sacrificing the class, or the glass (plastic cups? Gag me with a spoon). And, since your whole existence is a party, your frugality and budgeting translate into every part of your life.
Careers To Excel In: Contrary to what people think, you don’t just throw parties to show off or brag — you genuinely love to people-please. Party planning is your forte, but it might be a better idea to leave that as a weird, self-absorbed hobby instead of a full-time career. Try going into social work, medical care, PR, or sales to satisfy your need to please because we all know that customer service needs more people who actually give a hoot about solving our problems.
The New ESFJ
Something New To Try: You know it best: parties get very expensive, very quickly, especially after all daddy’s money is gone, and your loving, apathetic spouse is getting tired of getting bank alerts on their phone. Try to make it your goal to have the cheapest event of the year, whether that’s just in competition with yourself or with your friends.
Celebrities Like You: Bill Clinton, Taylor Swift, Steve Harvey, Tyra Banks
Things that upset you: Isolation, regulations, uncertainty, unintentionally treating other people badly, lack of emotional support, disrupting harmony, dismissal of how you feel, not being appreciated, challenges to procedures in place.
Average Income: $63K
“Never allow a person to tell you ‘no’ who doesn’t have the power to say ‘yes.’” – Eleanor Roosevelt
“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about the things that matter.” – Martin Luther King
Financial Weaknesses: You’re so indecisive that, most of the time, you can’t even figure out how to spend your money—so you just don’t. Unless it’s giving $20 to the homeless man on the corner that you refer to as one of your friends, or only buying something after months and months of doing hardcore research in your free time (do you even have a social life?); you prefer to spend all your money on your loved ones or strangers.
How INFJ’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: In your friend group, you’re the “responsible” one (or the “boring” one, but I’ll leave it to you to decide). Your friends, though? They’re living paycheck to paycheck, still getting all the newest technology, spending some bajillion dollars on drinks and food every weekend, and still asking to borrow money. You either need new friends, a better job, or a print-out budgeting sheet to passive-aggressively hand out to your mooching loved ones. But watch that ego, chief — you’re still not cool enough to brag about being financially stable.
Careers To Excel In: Conversations between you and an authoritative figure usually go along the lines of:
“INFJ, I need ABC from you by the end of the day.”
“Ok, I’ll get right on that, but why ABC, and why by the end of the day?”
“INFJ, can you just do it.”
“Well, of course, I’ll do it, I just can’t start until I know why.”
Your motivation comes from your drive for a purpose which, unfortunately, almost everyone misreads as questioning authority (especially those in authority). So, instead of continually fighting powers in your life (trust me on this one, it never ends well), try a career as a nurse, a freelancer, a behind-the-scenes entrepreneur, or a writer.
The New INFJ
Something New To Try: Alright, we all get it. You have the skills, the smarts, and the desire to create extensive budgets, plan 100 years ahead, and afford everything you want — but as soon as literally, any inconvenience occurs, all your plans get thrown by the wayside. You mentally snap when your perfectionist visions don’t transcend into reality which ruins a lot of good things for you. Next time a financial emergency/inconvenience comes up, try to adapt your budget to it. Adapt, evolve, conquer.
Celebrities Like You: Martin Luther King Jr., Nelson Mandela, Mother Teresa, Morgan Freeman
Things that upset you: Disorder, conflict, lack of closure, routine disturbed, negativity from others, not being appreciated for hard work, ideas met with criticism, feeling misunderstood, forced time management, indecisiveness, loudness, dismissal of feelings, shortsightedness, inflexible work environment, share circles.
Average Income: $60K
“I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me.” – Joshua Graham
“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.” – Traditional Buddhist Teaching
“Surround yourself with the dreamers and the doers, the believers, and the thinkers, but most of all, surround yourself with those who see the greatness within you, even when you don’t see it yourself.” – Edmund Lee
Financial Weaknesses: As a carefree, whimsical little forest fairy, you have no concept of how money works in the real world. If you come from a wealthy family, you throw your money in any direction you desire, with an annoyingly realistic set of financial goals. If you come from a less affluent family, you give even less of a hoot about money than your wealthier counterparts because, as your pragmatic-self likes to remind people relentlessly, you’ve done just fine with what you have so far, so why worry?
How INFP’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: So, you don’t care about money. But inherently, you have to to survive, so your ultimate goal is a simple (and, again, annoyingly realistic) one: Make enough money, so you don’t have to care about money. Obviously, hordes of people hate your careless attitude towards your bank account (INFJ’s, to be specific), but the only financial conundrum you’ve ever encountered was that one time you gave the homeless man your last $10, and then you realized you were hungry — so you had to wait an hour until you got home to eat something. Poor you.
Careers To Excel In: Mirror, Mirror, on the wall — what is the most existentially gratifying job for my creative, independent, and slightly egotistical self? Well, my friend, let me tell you: Pretty much anything that serves a higher purpose and helps others who are unable to help themselves. You enjoy using your weird authoritative nature for the common good and to feed that colossal hero complex you have (yeah, it’s that obvious). Try a career in politics, writing, emergency medicine, or professional mirror testing (since you just love looking at your reflection).
The New INFP
Something New To Try: Having that thick, cash-filled wallet must feel so nice to carry around, right? With all those $20’s, maybe a few $10’s, and a $50 when you’re feeling fly, that wallet feeds your ego more than you let it feed you (you literally have 7 Cheesecake Factory gift cards, use them already). Instead of carrying around all that cash and never having any idea of how you spend your money, try only using a debit card one month to track your spending and see where you can cut back (or spend more!).
Celebrities Like You: Shakespeare, J.R.R. Tolkien, Johnny Depp, Julia Roberts
Things that upset you: Mundane work, disharmony, criticism, being rushed, open disrespect, values undermined or challenged, routine, unclear expectations,k decisions, metrics, crowds, negativity from others, shutting down ideas, required time management, impeding on individuality.
Average Income: $69K
“Inclinations are hearts’ instructions.” – Sheherazade
“What I am really saying is that you don’t need to do anything, because if you see yourself in the correct way, you are all as much extraordinary phenomena of nature as trees, clouds, the patterns in running water, the flickering of fire, the arrangement of the stars, and the form of a galaxy. You are all just like that, and there is nothing wrong with you at all.” – Alan Watts
Financial Weaknesses: ENFJ’s are the most likely personality type to start a cult, but as it turns out, starting a cult is pretty expensive. Lucky for you, your following of people are just so willing to give you their proceeds as a thank you for being so generous and wise. Unfortunately, however, you’re just so tenderhearted and providing that you put all that money back into the communal farmlands and that secret jacuzzi for you and your boo. Though, you might want to tone down the expenditures because now everyone is poor– even you.
How ENFJ’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: Your catchphrase is, “How can I help?” even when both of you know you can’t. As a benevolent cult leader, you tend to go above and beyond when helping your friends in order to gain a loyal (and, sometimes, indebted) following. And, even though you may not be financially stable (seriously, stop giving people your money), your friends will repay you in a plethora of services like (but not limited to): doing your housework, getting other people to join your “close friend group,” and sometimes even sharing their wives with you.
Careers To Excel In: The answer is yes, my friend — you can absolutely be a modern cult leader in a wonderful expanse of soul-draining professions such as HR, sports coaching, religious teaching, event coordinating, and, of course, politics. However, given your affinity towards seeing the results of your generous gifts and services, you would do best in an environment where you can make the ultimate decisions, advise people on everything, and occasionally hold day-long meetings on the importance of loyalty (so, essentially, a cult).
The New ENFJ
Something New To Try: One of the more “socially appropriate” alternatives to being a cult leader is generally being a manager of a diverse team. If you’ve never managed a team of people before (let’s not kid ourselves, you manage everyone), try to look at a team as a group of individuals with different purposes and abilities. This way, you can control each individual to do as you please until they all work for you in a cohesive, loyal following.
Celebrities Like You: Barack Obama, Oprah Winfrey, Ben Affleck, Jennifer Lawrence
Things that upset you: Seclusion, unexpected changes, not being appreciated, short-sightedness, indecision, excessive criticism, not enough time to brainstorm, procrastinators, working in uncooperative environments, dismissal of feelings, disrupted harmony.
Average Income: $66K
“If you’re offered a seat on a rocket ship, don’t ask what seat. Just get on!” – Sheryl Sandberg
“I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.” – E. B. White
Financial Weaknesses: You’re not broke because Mercury is in retrograde, Stephanie, you’re broke because your daily horoscope told you it’s your “lucky day” so you bought 50 lotto tickets and invested your savings in Tesla. And, no, that doesn’t mean you should buy more crystals, it means you should take your financial advice from people, not stars.
How ENFP’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: You’re somewhat stingy, but it’s a good thing (for you — other people hate you). But, alas, it’s your money, and you’ll be just darned if someone, anyone, tells you how to spend it. Do you want to spend $750 on back-to-school items? You do you, boo boo. Do you want to put up a fight when someone tells you to bring your vegan snacks to their barbeque even though you know for a darn fact that other people ate more of your vegan snacks than her weird meat sticks? Throw it to the wayside, my friend —people need to respect your hard earned money (but so do you, so don’t go crazy).
Careers To Excel In: Alright Hotshot, let’s get one thing clear: You can’t be a Black Market dealer, helicopter pilot, and a private agent for Area 51 all at the same time — leave some of the cool jobs for the rest of us. You would do best with one job in a career that is constantly shifting, giving you problems to solve, and exploring different pathways like Audience Development, HR, human science, or detective work.
The New ENFP
Something New To Try: The good news is, you’re popular (unless your name is Ryan — I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules). The bad news is, you’re so popular that you tend to get pulled in quite a few directions in your career, your hobbies, and your personal life. Try to focus less on pleasing people and wasting your money on activities you hate (we both know you hate them), and focus more on doing hobbies you love, like alien hunting, crystal jewelry making, palm reading, or being your town’s famous local hippie.
Celebrities Like You: Robert Downey Jr., Robin Williams, Kelly Clarkson, Quentin Tarantino
Things that upset you: Obligation, thoughtlessness, spreadsheets, procedures, rudeness, multitasking, overwhelming workload, forced to make decisions before ready, mundane work, overcommitment, rules in a relationship, long-term plans, micromanaging, distrust, endless detail, lack of enthusiasm, organization at the expense of creativity.
Average Income: $71K
“You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.” – Harlan Ellison
“And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.”– Friedrich Nietzsche
Financial Weaknesses: As someone who is more likely to build a robot companion than to waste their time investing in an unexcusably imperfect human, INTJ’s have truly earned the title of “Architect.” Your future looks eerily close to that of the cynical, old, wealthy man that lives down the street in the remarkably out-of-place house that was built in 1969. But don’t worry, your arrogance will deny all of the above (except for the future wealth. I mean, how could someone as smart as you not be wealthy?) to the point of irrational hatred for your grumpy future self.
How INTJ’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: Since you’re a walking emotional void, you might just be the perfect person to make risky investments (calculated risks, but nonetheless, risks for the average human). Even though you’re not one for the emotionally triggered spending sprees, you do tend to give in to the newest, techiest innovations and companies right as they come out. After all, Apple and Netflix couldn’t have gone as far as they did without your investments (duh, they should be thanking you).
Careers To Excel In: Spoiler alert: You’re a natural-born architect (mostly because of your massive ego, but I guess talent might have a place in there, too). Because of your continually growing void of emotion, you tend to be better in careers that require distance from feelings, enjoyment, and everything else irrational. Your ideal job would be something like a hitman, an investment banker, a CIA operative, or a helpdesk operator.
The New INTJ
Something New To Try: Let’s make a list of all the things that anger you, shall we? Procrastination, challenging your competence, micromanaging, lengthy discussions about feelings, indecision, lack of initiative or goals, and “going with the flow.” Are you angry yet? Well, if you find yourself getting mad at other people for having these attributes, then maybe you should read this excellent book to help you stress less about other people. It could potentially save you money in the long run (heart attacks are a lot more expensive than you’d think).
Celebrities Like You: Elon Musk, Spock, Vladimir Putin, Edna Mode
Things that upset you: Disorganized work environment, procrastination, shortsightedness, indecision, talking about feelings, dismissal of logic, lack of initiative, micromanaging, challenging competence, mindless rule followers, limited time to change plans, not having a goal.
Average Income: $64K
“Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose.” – Steve Jobs
“Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth.” – Henry David Thoreau
Financial Weaknesses: You can’t even buy cereal without second-guessing yourself and getting a different box, so what makes you think you can make a soundly practical purchase on your own? That’s right; you can’t. Remember that pillow you bought last year after spending 4 hours in the store trying to choose one out of the 5 you deemed worthy? Remember how you still regret picking that one instead of the other one? Yeah, for the love of all that is holy, please do not invest your money without adult supervision. No one wants to hear about your failed $2k investment for the next decade.
How INTP’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: One of your best strengths is also your worst downfall: Open-mindedness. Being open-minded but also chronically indecisive is the worst combination of any two traits, but somehow, you make it work. Sometimes, your indecisiveness ends in just not deciding at all, which is beneficial when you’re stuck between making an emotionally triggered purchase, and making a practical, yet expensive purchase. Who knew you could take a positive spin on your most unfortunate flaw? Apparently not you, you adorably oblivious human robot.
Careers To Excel In: You can correctly explain the most complicated nuances of the theories of quantum thermodynamics to a toddler, but walking upstairs and not putting your pants on backward are seemingly impossible tasks. You would thrive in a career that appreciates your complete lack of common sense but still allows you to create your theories on black holes, the creation of the universe, and the beginning of humankind.
The New INTP
Something New To Try: This may come as a surprise to you, but your ability to simply function appears to have not formed. Try hanging out with a toddler to learn simple tasks like tieing your shoelaces, doing your hair literally any other way than how it looks now, and how to tell when your shirt is both inside out and backward. Once you’ve completed this task, try going to the grocery store and not second-guessing your first cereal choice.
Celebrities Like You: Bill Gates, Kristen Stewart, Albert Einstein, Isaac Newton
Things that upset you: Socializing, talking with people who don’t listen, having to repeat yourself, small talk, strict guidelines, not finding logic in situations, too many extroverted activities, noise and interruptions, others not understanding ideas, being int eh spotlight, challenging competence.
Average Income: $83K
“Life is to be lived. If you have to support yourself, you had bloody well better find some way that is going to be interesting. And you do not do that by sitting around.” – Katherine Hepburn
Financial Weaknesses: In a world where mothers are swaddling their babies, children are picking flowers, and butterflies are fluttering by, you are content that your plans for world domination are slowly but surely coming to fruition. However, world domination is quite pricey, and you’re so stubborn about achieving these overlord-ish goals that you’re more than willing to pay the price (hello, debt!).
How ENTJ’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: But, fear not! If all goes according to plan, you’ll be bringing in the big bucks soon enough. No one said success comes without struggle right? Just don’t get too caught up in that power complex, it could come back to bite you in the butt (unless you actually take over the world, then no one can hurt you).
Careers To Excel In: So, you aren’t the best at being in a relationship (unless it’s a Christian Grey/Anastasia Steele deal), but that ridiculously authoritative side to you has some real merit in the business world. Failure isn’t even a word in your dictionary (neither is ‘democracy’), and anyone who hinders you even a little bit will feel the consequences. But, hey, it gets things done right?
The New ENTJ
Something New To Try: Look in your closet. What do you see? Do all of your shirts have collars? Do you wear a blazer with every collared shirt? Are all of your blazers the same shade of blue and grey? Do you even own a casual T-shirt? I get it, your authority is so much more effectively communicated when you’re clearly the best dressed in the room, but that make’s you seem like, well, an evil overlord. Maybe that’s what you want, I don’t know, but calm down and buy a Nirvana shirt or something.
Celebrities Like You: Steve Jobs, Gordon Ramsay, Whoopi Goldberg, Jim Carrey
Things that upset you: Inefficiency, indecisiveness, misinformation, disregarding logical decisions, loneliness, others ignoring guidelines, disorganization, short-sightedness, inability to make decisions, lack of control, and most of all others challenging your competence.
Average Income: $62K
“The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough. They’re there to stop the other people.” – Randy Pausch
Financial Weaknesses: Have you ever seen a chef make a taco? They start with all the separate ingredients in different bowls, take the tortilla foundation, add said ingredients in order of most moist to least moist, and then, BAM — pico de gallo. It’s a perfect taco. Well, everyone who isn’t you does this with their arguments, their budgets, their advice, etc. You, though? You just stick your grimy hands in there and completely deconstruct all of it until it’s a jumbled mess of nonsense. Budgets? Psh. They don’t last more than 10 minutes with you.
How ENTP’s Get Rich
Financial Strengths: You may be a master-deconstructor, but you’re also, quite literally, the devil’s advocate. If you’re approaching a large purchase, whether it’s practical or emotional, you have Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde on tap to argue for every perspective imaginable. Lucky for you, you get to choose which personality you want at any given moment (RIP, Mr. Hyde). Use these powers for good, my friend. There’s no need for debt when you can make a savings account.
Careers To Excel In: You value your rationality and insight in every situation, so being a baker, a writer, an HR manager, or a vet probably wouldn’t be the best option for your slightly insensitive inclinations. However, as the most argumentative human on earth, you thrive in environments where pushback and heartless input is welcomed like in law, science, system analysis, and psychology.
The New ENTP
Something New To Try: We all know you go absolutely bonkers over new technological inventions, apps, or weird scientific discoveries, but that doesn’t mean you should be spending all of your rent money on those every month (you’re 2 months behind rent because of those speakers– get it together, nerd). Instead of spending your cash willy-nilly, try subscribing to a monthly tech box like Tek Crates or Gadget Box. It’ll be a wonderful nerd Christmas every month!
Celebrities Like You: Alfred “Weird Al” Yankovic, Mark Twain, Tom Hanks, Jack Sparrow
Things that upset you: Being told to do something unstimulating, shutting down your ideas, isolation, stubbornness, dismissing your ideas, deadlines, disrespect of your abilities, too many details, boring task work, focusing on personal problems, inefficiency, personal problems.
If you don’t know your personality type, take the quiz at 16personalities.com.